I’ve been dealing with a lot of disappointment the past few months. It can be crippling if we give the enemy the power to harvest that disappointment into something even more negative in our hearts and minds. I read recently that “disappointment holds the power to make us better or bitter” (Suzie Eller, Come With Me). Powerful truth, for sure.
I started thinking about all of the ups and downs I’ve experienced over the last few months, and how I’ve really tried to keep a positive, Jesus-focused outlook. But then there are “those” days, the days when I wake up and stare at the ceiling and think about all of the failures in my past. I think about what isn’t going well at this moment, and how God could possibly have a plan for me in this season. Just then, though, comes the quiet whisper “I’m here.”
Psalm 42:11 says, “Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.”
Lysa TerKeurst, a popular Christian women’s leader, wrote a passage that really caused me to evaluate (read: kick myself) my current situation. She said, “In the midst of the unexpected, we have the opportunity to make one of our greatest ‘yes’ decisions ever. Let this unexpected point to your strength, not your weakness. Maybe you’ve been entrusted with this-not cursed.” Wow. Entrusted. Would God trust me, the emotional mess, with anything for more than a hot second?
I’m going to be really transparent here: I have no idea what God has planned for me right now. I think I hear Him loud and clear at one moment, jump in the lake with both feet, and then look around to find that other than having a couple of wet feet, I’m back at the same point I started several months ago. It’s hard. Beyond hard. It’s a spiritual, emotional, and even physical battle of proportions that I have never had to deal with before—and I’ve lived through some pretty tough stuff, as have many of you.
I usually turn on worship music while I’m doing my devotions, and as I sat listening for a moment this morning, this chorus from the song “Confidence” by Sanctus Real spoke to me and became my prayer. If you find yourself where I am right now, I encourage you to do the same. Ask God to show you how your unexpected is your opportunity.
“Give me faith like Daniel in the lion’s den,
Give me hope like Moses in the wilderness
Give me a heart like David, Lord be my defense
So I can face my giants with confidence.”